The real reason you keep procrastinating (and how to stop)
Why your brain avoids the work you actually want to do, and what it’s trying to keep you safe from.
I cannot tell you how long I’ve been procrastinating writing this article.
Weeks.
It’s been weeks since I had the idea to write about procrastination and reflect on my own (because it’s literally what I’m living and doing every day, and grappling to overcome), to this date where I’m sat down with a clear hour ahead of me to actually do. the. damn. thing.
Procrastinating is a colossal waste of time, energy and brain space.
It’s taken hours of my life where, instead of writing this piece, I’ve productively procrastinated by doing smaller, fiddly little tasks like responding to emails and tidying folders and then getting sucked into doom scrolling… or I go into my coaching group and complain about how I haven’t made time for content creation again this week… instead of just sitting down to write.
The other thing that makes me rage about procrastination is that when I finally get to sit down and do the thing – the sales pitches, writing that Substack, tackling those contracts I’ve been burying my head about like an ostrich in the sand – I blood well enjoy doing them all!
I get such a buzz from getting stuck into those things – they’re often meaty, deep and they remind me of my capabilities and strengths in the moment I’m doing them.
I am loving writing this Substack right this moment of course, as I knew deep down I would. Yet I got in my own way of doing it.
And here’s the thing: I know what I should be doing.
I’ve been working in various forms for 20 years now, for myself or for others. I am organised. I have a plan. I have notebooks and to-do lists. I’m a smart, capable woman.
And maybe you can relate. Because most solopreneurs already know what to do. Or they’ve invested in coaching and support to show them a path, or already have the qualifications.
The issue is not a lack of knowledge.
The issue is not you’ve got the wrong planner or system.
The issue is the invisible resistance that stops action.
And this is where most procrastination advice completely misses the point.
The problem with typical procrastination advice
Having been in the self-employed, self-help type spaces for nearly a decade you can safely say I’ve heard all the common suggestions when it comes to overcoming procrastination. I only just read a Substack article on this exact topic last week.
It was filled with the usual list of telling you to:
Get an accountability partner
Download a productivity app
Attend a co-working session
Write your goals down (ground breaking!)
Scheduling tasks in your calendar
These tools can help execution.
But even with all of these in place, if the underlying fear beneath the task remains, you will still avoid it. You will simply procrastinate more efficiently.
Your protector will just find more and more clever ways to side step your attempts to bring that task to a co-working Zoom call or override what your time-tracker is telling you. It’s been doing this ‘protection’ work for a long time in your head, it laughs in the face of these methods!
To understand procrastination properly, you have to ask a different question.
“What am I afraid will happen if I do this?”
If you’ve been reading my Substack for long enough you’ll know that I work with my clients around developing the idea of having an internal protector, a Safety Guardian as I like to call them.
This part of our brain tries to keep us safe from risks, feelings and experiences that we’ve had in the past that it does not want us to go back and repeat.
Procrastination therefore is not a personality flaw or a disorganisation problem: it’s a protective behaviour.
Part of your brain is trying to keep you safe.
Not from the task itself, but from the emotional risk attached to it.
The crazy thing is, when we procrastinate we don’t actually keep ourselves safe from risk at all. Instead, our protector is dumping us in the exact risk that it kindly and protectively thinks it can help you avoid through this behaviour.
Let me explain with real life examples:
I procrastinate on sitting down to write a Substack article because I fear writing this Substack is a waste of my time. So I waste time by avoiding doing it at all. Which means I lost the time anyway. I’m just one Substack short in this version, which reinforces my belief that no-one wants to read my content, because my feed remains empty for the last month, with less chance of people reading and finding something they engage with in my content.
In another example from my daily work life I procrastinate because of fear of failure. I need to write to promoters and sell tours, many of whom I know will never reply or say ‘no.’ I fear the tour will fail and I will disappoint the orchestra when I can’t deliver what they want. But by avoiding writing to those promoters, I’m pretty much guaranteeing the tour will fail, because I’m not selling it.
Can you see how the cycle perpetuates itself?
Why don’t you try it out.
Think of something you know you need or want desperately to do in your solopreneur business, but have avoided for the last few weeks (or months, or years – hey, no judgement!).
What are you afraid might happen if you start tackling it?
Maybe it’s:
Failure
Embarrassment
Judgement
Rejection
Wasting time
Finding it too complicated or overwhelming
Success and the responsibility that follows
That Safety Guardian in your brain? They would rather avoid the action entirely than risk experiencing those feelings.
Maybe when you see what pops out on that list to you, you realise that you’ve experienced those things before – in a work setting, or a personal one. Maybe recently, maybe years ago. And ooof has it stuck with you.
And when we see it like that? Procrastination can be seen as self-protection, not laziness.
Why productivity hacks alone don’t work
Accountability helps execution.
Planning helps organisation.
Don’t get me wrong I am a massive fan of both of these! I used to run co-working sessions in my old membership and they were wildly popular and productive. And don’t get me started on the gorgeous addiction that is a well-used planner.
But neither of these addresses the belief driving the avoidance.
If your underlying belief is:
“I will be judged if I do this.”
Then no productivity system will make the task feel safe.
This is why brilliantly capable solopreneurs can know the exact strategy, have a clear plan and still not take action. And that’s why I coach using my TRUST framework now – because I am done seeing talented business owners getting in their own way because their Safety Guardian protector is running the show and having you procrastinate just one more day.
The real work is understanding the fear
Instead of asking:
“How do I force myself to do this?”
Ask:
“What am I afraid will happen if I do this?”
For example:
If I launch this offer, people might reject it.
If I post this idea, someone might disagree with me.
If I raise my prices, clients might leave.
Mine right now in all honesty are probably:
If I write this post, it will just be a waste of time and it won’t get the sales I want.
or
If I write to those promoters, I’ll be judged for what I’m offering them and the response will confirm that my tour won’t work and I’ll disappoint my client.
Once named, the fear(s) becomes something you can work with. Instead of unconsciously avoiding by just sticking a plaster on it by telling an accountability buddy or forcing yourself into action.
A more useful way to respond to procrastination
If procrastination in your solo business is killing your buzz and stalling your progress and you have realised (from this article, or you knew it deep down already) that you are the bottleneck (deep compassion and love my friend! I see you!), then here’s what to do next:
1. Notice the resistance
What task am I avoiding?
2. Identify the fear
What am I worried might happen?
Think about the real core things when you reduce it right down, like:
Failure
Embarrassment
Judgement
Rejection
Wasting time
Finding it too complicated or overwhelming
Success and the responsibility that follows
3. Question the belief
Two ways to ask this:
Is this true? Is it definitely true?
Or
What else could happen? What else could be true if I did this?
4. Take a small experimental action
What is the smallest step I could take to test an alternative outcome from the one I fear?
For example, if I fear that writing my Substack article is a waste of my time, I don’t even have to push myself to write the article and get a response to it.
I could take an even smaller step – hop on to Substack with intention and notice how joyful, informative and compelling it is to read someone else’s article and how it draws me in to their work and offers and starts a relationship I want to continue.
This little experiment? = Evidence for my brain that creating content is powerful and can lead to enquiries and a warmer audience.
If you take something away from this article, let it be this:
Procrastination is not about discipline or hacks.
It is about self-trust.
When you trust that you can handle the outcome, whatever it is, you stop avoiding the action.
The next time you find yourself procrastinating and it’s creating a bottleneck in your business, resist the urge to search for another productivity hack.
Pause instead.
Ask yourself the real question:
What am I afraid will happen if I do this?
Because the answer to that question is where the real work begins.
You can find out more about working with me here.
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This was just the words I needed. I'm surprised it's not viral! Thanks Vicky!!
This is SUCH a useful perspective Vicky. Thanks for taking the time to share it on your substack!